Women – The Glorious Sacrificers

Trapped in the stereotypical beliefs, women sometimes have to take a step back and give up on their dreams.

There are multiple reasons why women have to suppress their desire to be independent and compromise with the norms of the world.

Going back in the older times, when the technology was not so advanced as it is today and also the people strictly stuck to the cultural beliefs, not much attention was given to the education and dreams of the girl child but the only focus that the parents had on was making the girls a perfectionist in the household work. At an early stage they were made to marry as the so called age of marriage for girls was in between 18-25. After which they were considered to be too old for marriage. Hence, the dreams of many women got crushed and they had to stay silent as they were made to believe that this is the right thing. This is what is meant to happen.

While some women had to give up on their dreams due to lack of technologies or source of education in their area. Traveling for hours everyday to pursue their career in science or other streams as the source of education was not available in the area in which they stayed was considered as unsafe. So that’s another reason that they had to forget about becoming a doctor and compromise with being a housewife.

Some women somehow pursued their graduation and wanted to go for higher education but were pulled behind by lack of money or family disputes.

After marriage, women get involved in their married life. Looking after their husband and in laws in their only duty.

Unsupportive husband and opposing the decision of a working women in their family, the in laws, are another reason for a married women to sacrifice her wished and devote herself to her family.

It has been observed that it’s always the Men who are considered to be the working individual in a family. It’s only the men who are allowed the right to education, become independent and earn money.

Why is it that they are never expected to sacrifice these things but women are?

After having children, a women’s entire focus goes to the nourishment and upbringing of the child. So not even in the back of her she remembers that she wanted to be something else once. She completely forgets about it.

And then by the age of 35 or 40, when her children are capable of taking care of themselves completely, the process of regret starts. She starts wishing again that she could have studied more or raised her voice against early marriage. She wishes to be independent again. She wishes to be earning for herself and fulfilling her little wishes that she sacrificed her entire life, mostly for her children. Not because she is forced to. But it is who she is- The Glorious Sacrificer.

Some women also realize that

You are never too old to set another goal or to dream another dream.

So they complete their education or start working.

Some take up the job of teaching while some make their hobbies like stitching into their source of income.

Still the support of their family and their permission is required.

Her husband would tell her, ” I’m the man and only I should earn.” Or he might say, ” what is it that you need? Tell me and I’ll provide.”

And once again she has to supress her dreams and forget about it. But this time it is forever.

In some cases, where the woman has to go through domestic violence and the only reason that she tolerates it is poor education that brings unemployment. Her parents won’t accept her, the society would talk about her and she wouldn’t be able to fight for the custody of her child neither would she be able to provide the required financial support in the upbringing of her child due to lack of money and power. There happens another sacrifice, the sacrifice of self respect.

Some women are lucky who have a supportive husband and in laws. She is allowed to go out and work and earn for herself. The family doesn’t see it as a sin but is proud of her and is happy that she is contributing to the family financially.

Women not always want to work because there is financial crisis or their wants are not fulfilled. It is also because it gives them a feeling of satisfaction that they are something on their own. They are something else may it be a doctor, a teacher, a tailor or anything else and not just a daughter, wife and a mother. They have achievements that they can proudly speak about. They can also bring the good news of promotion home to their family and be celebrated.

Women want to be something too.

To everyone reading this right now, I have something to say to each one of you.

If you are a women, do not give up on your dreams to achieve something for yourself. Follow your passion and the World will be yours one day.

If you are a parent, let her become independent and self sufficient before getting her married. Her career should be your priority so that she won’t have to compromise her self respect someday.

If you are a husband, you are the only support she needs. Stand with her. She has the right to all the happiness after everything that she has done for you and your family.

If you are a son or a daughter, encourage her, support her and stand with her. Talk to your family and explain them that her happiness also matters.

And to everyone in general, ask this question to the women of your family, what it was that she wanted to do before she had to give up? What did she want to be?

And tell her, ” I’m proud of you.”.