Dowry is one of the worst practices widespread in Indian society. There is a tradition of asking for a dowry at the time of marriage and greed among the groom’s family for quick and easy money. People are also asking for a dowry to keep up status.
The main problems of the dowry system in society are: The bride’s family, which usually belongs to the middle and low classes, face its bitter side. Parents often take out a loan for their daughter’s marriage. Most times, observing the lousy situation of their parents, the bride becomes mentally affected. Sometimes psychological torture caused by dowry leads to suicidal tendencies.
Most of the people are involve in the dowry system, weather they belong to upper-class families or lower class, educated or illiterate they all are involved in it. It is the system of transferring the money or property to the groom’s family from the bride family. The greed for dowry is increasing dad by day. It effects the mental and physical health of a person who is being compelled for giving dowry for their daughter’s well-being. Even the value of a girl is decided by the amount of dowry she has with her. This cause a state of distress and grief for those parents who is giving the dowry. If the dowry is not fulfilling the demands then after marriage the girl is not treated well by their in-laws and can be beaten to death. And also, many girls are left unmarried because their parents cannot afford dowry according to the demand by the groom’s family. The reason why most of the parents don’t wish to be blessed by a daughter is because of the dowry they have to give on her marriage.
We are in 2020. Dowry system was abolished in 1961 in India. The reason for the prevalence of this custom is the patriarchal society that values men over women. In India boys have a rate card in many societies. This is the unofficial price the boy is worth. And that worth is measured by the amount of dowry a boy will get upon marriage. The stronghold of the gender inequality in Indian society makes a bride’s family feel obliged to meet the dowry demands of the man who has ‘agreed’ to take care of the daughter. The second major reason is that the dowry system is too deeply rooted in the Indian culture that it is seen as normal and unchangeable. Even today, if people are reminded that dowry is a crime, they ignore it as an alternate reality which cannot change the age-old customs. Many educated families practice it, willingly or unwillingly, to avoid being criticized for not following the customs. After all who will dare to change the traditions? The third and most important reason is the dominance of the institution of marriage. A woman’s marriage is of the paramount importance in Indian families. If a woman’s marriage requires dowry in return of her secured married life which is a challenge in the world that is unsafe and discriminatory for women, it is never seen as a crime.
Dowry deaths are a result of this stagnancy in the traditions and cultures. Groom’s families take advantage of the stronghold of the dowry system which will ultimately bring them wealth. Often they ‘rightfully’ abandon or abuse the woman for dowry because she and her family did not fulfil their duty. This is a harsh reality that still haunts the lives of the women who are moving ahead towards a respectable, empowered and independent future. This system is the major reason why daughters are considered as a burden for the families. Consequently, families either keep the wealth aside for the daughter’s dowry rather than investing in her education or kill her before birth to get rid of the burden forever.
How far will women bear the weight of patriarchal traditions like these? How and when will the change begin? SheThePeople asked the same question to some young women, here is how they will bring the change:
Avleen, 19-year-old and a student of English Honours, told SheThePeople that a marriage founded on the exchange of dowry is only a business deal. She believes that marriage truly needs love and respect. “If a boy cannot marry me without my money, I don’t need him. I am more capable of doing business with my own money.” She further talked about how she will convince her family to not seek dowry for her brother’s marriage. “I would tell them not to seek dowry because we don’t need money to keep someone else’s girl. If we like her and my brother likes her, then that love is enough for the marriage.”
Eduindex News 