LGBTQIA+ is an acronym for lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, queer, or questioning, The “plus” represents other sexual identities including pansexual and Two-Spirit or any other sexual identity not included in the acronym. A stands for asexual and ally. today we’ll be focusing on the latter.
First, let’s understand what is the meaning of an ally.
An ally, straight ally, or heterosexual ally is a heterosexual and cisgender person who supports equal civil rights, gender equality, and LGBT social movements, challenging homophobia, biphobia, and transphobia.
We don’t have proper sex education in our schools or at homes, as a matter of fact, it’s considered a taboo and a violation of our deeply held religious values.
but Traditional Hindu literary sources do speak of homosexuality even though indirectly, changes of sex, homoerotic encounters, and intersex or third gender characters are often found both in traditional religious narratives such as the Vedas, Mahabharata, Ramayana, and Puranas as well as in regional folklore.
Homophobic memes and slurs that have been normalized in our daily life further increase and normalise the existing homophobia, and even after knowing the right facts people do not want to unlearn their previously learnt bad belief systems.
Today’s article will be about unlearning these wrong belief systems and deciphering the ultimate guide to be an ally.
Step 1 is to gather up the courage and to start talking about the things that are considered taboo in your friend circle and with your friends. yes, This can be really uncomfortable and awkward. But the fact that you are uncomfortable can be a good thing. That discomfort can be a sign that you are growing and changing as you learn. Trust it.
Step 2 is to listen, It is not uncommon for lesbian, gay, bisexual or transgender (LGBT) young people to spend years working up the courage to come out to their parents, family and friends. LGBT youth tend to fear rejection by those closest to them and feel isolated as if they are the only ones who feel the way they do. They often fear being “discovered” at school by saying the wrong thing or dressing a certain way. And they feel pressure to fit in by laughing at homophobic jokes even when it hurts their sentiments deeply. Being an ally you should be there for your friends who belong to the LGBT community. listening to them talk about their experiences can be difficult. It can be emotionally intense to hear people talk about the hurt and suffering they experience. There are very few places and groups in India where people can talk freely about their sexual identity and not having a space to talk about things that are going on in your mind can make anyone feel overwhelmed, by listening you can reduce that feeling of being closeted and overwhelmed.
Listening as an ally requires that you make space for others to talk and that you trust and believe what they tell you. and Remember: just because you can’t see the evidence for something right away doesn’t mean it’s not happening.
Step 3 is learning from people who experience oppressions is important, but it’s not fair to expect them to teach you everything you need to know about it. As an ally, it’s your responsibility to spend your own time and energy learning more. Reliable resources tend to be ones created by people who are knowledgeable on the issues, either through research or lived experience Learning about social injustice can be complicated and difficult. Most of the learning that you do as an ally is about letting go of what you thought was true. Often times this is called “unlearning” because it involves questioning and rejecting oppressive beliefs that you may have held for a long time. Family, friends, media, and community beliefs are the sources of some of your most deeply held knowledge about the world, but they can also be the places where you learn prejudiced and oppressive things too. When unlearning, dig deep and be honest with yourself about what you believe and how it informs your actions. As you learn about your privilege as a non-oppressed person, try to be honest with yourself about how that privilege has affected your life and who you are. It can be really uncomfortable to realize that stuff and that’s ok. Again, trust your struggle.
Step 4 is speaking up when you hear people say things that are wrong or prejudiced is another way to act as an ally. Having social power or privilege means that you have a social responsibility to use and acknowledge that power in ways that are for the good of others. The ability to stay silent and not acknowledge oppression or speak out about it is one of the stolen advantages that you inherit as privileged people.
Sometimes it can help by starting to say even just a few words in response to an oppressive or disrespectful comment. You can try saying things like, “That’s not cool,” “That’s disrespectful,” or “Why’d you say that?” to try and let people know that their actions are oppressive/prejudiced/disrespectful/wrong and that you noticed. Applying your knowledge in real-life situations is going to take practice. Not everyone is comfortable speaking up in all situations with everyone. It can take time to learn how to say things in the way that you want them to be heard. The more comfortable you get at speaking out, the closer you might get to teaching others about oppression and social justice which is an important part of being an ally.
Step 5 is educating Others as an ally, it’s your responsibility to use what you’ve learned to educate others in your own privileged communities (e.g., think straight people educating straight people, men educating other men, etc.). You have the power to stop resist prejudiced and oppressive beliefs in your family, friends, communities, and the media. Information is often better received when it’s peer to peer, and being a member of a privileged group means that your voice and opinion are more often heard when you speak on an issue. Basically, when people see you as part of their community they’re more likely to listen to you! You can use that advantage to speak about what you believe is right; challenge others when they say something oppressive or take the time to teach others what they may not know about oppression.
In conclusion, being an ally is not always easy, but it’s always worth it. Using social privilege to oppress others is one of many terrible injustices of our world, but just having privilege doesn’t make you a terrible person; it’s all about how you use it. Allyship is a journey. It never really stops or ends, but continues as a constant opportunity for growth and learning in your life. Being an ally is really about nurturing a sense of humility within yourself. Allowing yourself to be a learner can be a fulfilling role. Being an ally is about showing love and recognizing a sense of community. Knowing you made the world a more loving or accepting place is worth it in the end.
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