Love is the most significant thing in human’s life. Each science and every single literature masterwork will tell you about it. Humans are also social animals. We lived for centuries with this way of life, we were depended on one another to tell us how our clothes fit us, how our body is whether healthy or emaciated. All these we get the honest opinions of those who love us, those who care for us and makes our happiness paramount.
Love is a set of emotions, behaviors, and beliefs with strong feelings of affection. So, for example, a person might say he or she loves his or her dog, loves freedom, or loves God. The concept of love may become an unimaginable thing and also it may happen to each person in a particular way.
What is love? My mind did say,
A caring touch?
A gentle way?
It’s both of these, but so much more,
Numerous aspects , to explore.
What is love? I searched my soul,
A loving glance?
A hand to hold?
It is these things, but just one part,
Of the beauty that lies within the heart.
What is love? I asked my heart,
It seemed the best place,
Where I should start.
Is it fireworks, comets, or astral displays,
Which cause us to feel, so deeply this way?
What is love? It’s simple you see,
It’s essential as air,
For our souls to breathe.
It replenishes your faith, and self- esteem,
Allowing you to fulfill, all of your dreams.
What is love? You’ll be glad to know,
Is the chance for two hearts,
To share and to grow.
Trust, compassion, and a listening ear,
Will dispel all your doubts, cast out all your fears.
To love is to share life together,
to build special plans just for two,
to work side by side,
and then smile with pride,
as one by one, dreams all come true.
To love is to make special memories
of moments you love to recall,
of all the good things
that sharing life brings.
Love is the greatest of all.
And when this love gets decorated with the threads of marriage it becomes perfect,
In every single way.
A beautiful fairy tale is a wedding day.
The theme of the day is to have love and laughter.
And to live your days happily ever after.
Marriage is not a house or even a tent ,it is before that, and colder. It is like the edge of the forest, the edge of the desert.
Even child abuse specialists do not routinely screen for domestic violence. This shows how much more education we need to do, even among experts, to understand the known links between violence of the child and the parent.
But what happens when this love turns into a daily hatred. Domestic violence is an perfect example of this statement .
Domestic Violence is a worldwide crime and occurs across cultures in every social grouping in society regardless of age, race, religion, gender or sexual orientation. It is a fundamental violation of the human rights of each and every victim whether male or female adult .It can be defined as abusive, violent behaviour by one or both partners in a close intimate relationship and it can be physical, sexual, emotional or psychological abuse .
Although women make up the vast majority of victims of domestic violence, children and men are also victims. Research shows that children are affected because they are present during the abuse and a high percentage of men who abuse women also abuse children .Violence also occurs when a woman is pregnant and this can cause threatened or actual miscarriage. In a study at the Rotunda Maternity Hospital in Dublin, 12.5% of women reported having experienced domestic violence during a pregnancy and 75% of these women had experienced violence during their pregnancy.
We’ve often heard the adage, “Precaution is better than cure”. Now more than ever, as COVID-19 spreads like wildfire, we need to stay indoors. Reducing contact is the only way to control the virus. But social distancing means we’re going against our primal instinct that makes us human – being social. And while social media does help in being connected, it lacks physical affection, comfort and intimacy. In these times of extremes, all of us are feeling some kind of distress, a sign that we need to take care of our mental health.
Some of us are lucky to have loving homes, where we can stand by each other. Even as India is now put under lockdown for 21 days, can we assume that each person has a safe space to go back to?
As per World Health Organisation, 1 in 3 women face some form of domestic abuse. This adversely affects their mental and physical health. Moreover, throughout history, women’s bodies have been sites of violence. Societal norms expect women to take care of household duties; since ‘honour’ is linked to their virginity, women’s bodies become more vulnerable. Violence within intimate relationships of LGBTQ+ communities has also witnessed an increase. How then does quarantine and self-isolation affect those who’re caught in abusive situations?
When it comes to abuse, you believe there’s no way out. There is always help. There is always a way out.” ― Rev. Donna Mulvey
Data provided by the NWC states that there has been 100%increase in domestic violence.At a time when women are already shouldering higher proportions of the domestic burden during the lockdown, escalating tensions due to depleting resources are further accentuating domestic violence behind closed doors. Denied access to traditional forms of support – family, friends, doctors – the threat for these unfortunate women looms largest where they should be safest – inside their own homes.
Today I’m becoming a voice of one such victim, FATIMA.
FATIMA was brutally abused and forced into having sex with relatives and strangers by her husband for money. She is presentally suffering from anxiety and depression.
I still remember the day of 21 st March
The day I decided to become his forever.
Yes, we have became partners.
With shimmering bangles and a glowing gown,
I decided to walk with him forever.
In the presence of lord,
We promised to let us share the joys.
We were word and meaning, unite.
If he was thought and I was his sound.
The halt of the car lands me into reality,
I rush towards the door to welcome my love.
I am excited and nervous ,
After all it’s my anniversary today.
Dressed up with the perfect dress,
I smile shyly with Hope in my eyes.
Everything was flawless today,
I ensure that I dont commit any mistake .
Yet as always , he pulls my hair,
He slaps my face, he kicks me on the floor.
I love him so much, so I don’t have the strength,
To walk right out the door.
There’s blood on my face,
Everything hurts,
And all I can do is cry.
I dont know what made him mad,so this is what he does.
I wish I knew his reason why.
My heart won’t let me leave him,
And it hurts too much to try.
I wonder if this is how my life will be
From now until I die.
He says he’s sorry.
He says he loves me.
He takes me in his arms.
He even starts to cry.
I tell him I forgive him
And that everything is fine.
For now at least because I know
It will happen again in time.
Confinement is fostering the tension and strain created by security, health, and money worries. And it is increasing isolation for women with violent partners, separating them from the people and resources that can best help them. It’s a perfect storm for controlling, violent behavior behind closed doors,”
Where does the solution lie? In a society like India’s, where this malaise is deeply entrenched, experts say building awareness is vital. Sensitization campaigns and platforms like the ones established by Breakthrough, an NGO working to making gender-based violence a mainstream issue, can help.
Even child abuse specialists do not routinely screen for domestic violence. This shows how much more education we need to do, even among experts, to understand the known links between violence of the child and the parent.
The boys had always been her reason to stay, but now for the first time they were her reason to leave. She’d allowed violence to become a normal part of their life.” ― Liane Moriarty
As the steps to contain the transmission of the virus might require more stretches of isolation and confinement for the public, the government all around the globe, need to address the upsurge in domestic violence immediately. In this context:
It is critical that governments utilise a human rights and intersectional based approach to ensure that everyone, including the most marginalised, has access to necessary information, support systems and resources during the current crisis.
The state governments need to declare helplines as “essential services” that should remain open during lockdowns.
Media can sensitize the public against gender-based violence, publicise resources and services available and encourage the equitable sharing of domestic tasks at home.
Increase resourcing for NGOs that respond to domestic violence and aid — including shelter, counselling, and legal aid — to survivors, and promote those that remain open.
Ensure women’s timely access to necessary and comprehensive sexual and reproductive health services during the crisis, such as maternal health services, safe abortion etc.
Finally, the perpetrators of domestic violence must be brought to trial and repeated offenders must be dealt with strictly as per the provisions of law.
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