“Oh no it’s a girl child” started because of practices like dowry. When parents find out that they have to pay a huge fee in return for their daughter, no one would be happy at the birth of a girl child. We also have the society showing pity to parents of the girl child and saying things like:
“Oh you have a daughter in your family, you must have to pay a lot.”
“Thank God I am blessed with sons; money shall come my way”
Practices like dowry are what made female foeticide come to life. They check the gender of the child and undergo an abortion if it is a girl child.
Did you know that 20 women die every day due to the harassment of dowry?
You may think that practices like dowry only exists in the rural areas, but it also exists in the metropolitan cities. Well-educated families with both the men and the women working also believe in paying dowry.
Let’s talk about the concept of modern-day dowry. People no longer ask for dowry directly. They just expect “gifts.” These “gifts” make the bride’s side of the family go broke. The bride’s family spends so much money on the “gifts” and the marriage that a lot of the time they have to take a loan.
Do you think it is fair that the earnings and savings of parents are going to the groom’s family? I am sure a lot of us have heard sentences like “we need to save gold for the girl’s marriage”. Sentences like these are so normalised because the girl’s family has no option but to save money because the groom’s family needs “gifts”.
Tell me one reason why they deserve all the earnings of the girl’s family?
In old times the practice of dowry started because girls would not earn. So, parents would give the groom’s family dowry in return for taking care of their daughter’s expenses and living. But, even if the wives did not have a job they would still cook, clean, do the chores and support the groom’s family.
Now in modern society, when women do earn on their own what are we still giving the dowry for?
We as a society need to stop the practice of dowry because:
It financially drains the bride’s family: these so-called “gifts” which come as cars, gold, furniture, properties, money costs a lot and financially drains the family.
It makes the men more superior: if we pay the groom so much just because he is a man, the society is going to keep celebrating the birth of a boy child and look down upon the birth of the female child because it will cost them a lot.
It stops the women from growing: so many women are not able to study because the parents cannot afford dowry and education. Girls often sacrifice their dreams because their parents want to pay money to an unknown family.
Now, here me out. If all the bride’s family stop paying dowry or gifts to the groom’s family what will happen?
The girl won’t get married. Right?
Well, there are many countries where they don’t have to pay dowry to get married.
Shocking isn’t it?
Secondly, we all have to stop our so-called obsession with marriages. When a girl child is born why is marriage the only destination. The woman should be first encouraged to be independent on her own, have her own house, be successful without a man.
So can we all as a society stop these useless practices where we pay the groom’s family for no reason? Instead, can we start fulfilling the dreams of our daughters? The practice of dowry will only stop if all of us come together and say no to it.