Tag: mental wellbeing

What Is Survivor’s Guilt?

Some of us thank our lucky stars when tragedy happens, those we cherish while we remain unharmed, while others feel guilty. “Why should I be the only one? “What could I have done differently to avoid this?” we wonder. ” These are the defining characteristics of survivor guilt, an unofficial but very real condition.

Survivor guilt occurs when a person believes they have done something wrong by surviving a catastrophic incident in which others have died or otherwise succumbed. It can take many forms, ranging from bittersweet emotions to outright sadness. It is most frequently associated with large-scale disasters (such as combat casualties or plane accidents), but it can also manifest itself in unexpected ways.

The term “survivors’ guilt,” according to experts, has its origins in the Holocaust. There are people, for example, who refuse to forget and  instead feel obliged to ‘remember’ by an inner sense of responsibility; they purposefully deny and refuse themselves any happiness in living. Some wish to erase the memories but are unable to do so.

Most psychologists agree that survivors’ guilt is not a medically diagnosable syndrome, but it appears emotionally and physically in those who survive a terrible incident; guilt has traditionally been associated with war veterans, survivors of natural disasters, catastrophes, and sicknesses.

Survivor’s Guilt often falls into one of the the three overarching themes:

  1. Feeling guilty over one’s survival – When we think about survivor guilt, we usually think of this: if you were unharmed while others have been injured, you may believe you didn’t deserve to be protected and should’ve been hurt as well. You doubt the world’s fairness and justice.
  1. Feeling guilty over what you could have done – You’re regretful that you didn’t go above and beyond. You should’ve known better, and you should’ve tried harder. Perhaps you attempted but failed to save someone. There’s an exaggerated feeling of disappointment or blame: “If only I’d done things differently.”
  1. Feeling guilty over what you had done – You could also feel bad about something you did, such as shoving people out of the way to flee an armed gunman or abandoning your family for greater chances abroad. Alternatively, you may experience a great deal of guilt over things that happened by chance.

HOW TO COPE WITH SURVIVOR’S GUILT

  1. Embrace and let yourself feel the emotions – Survivor’s guilt is a known response to trauma, even if it is not particularly rational. Embrace and allow yourself to feel the emotions that emerge. Allow yourself time to absorb the feelings of guilt, sadness, anxiety, and sadness that often come with a traumatic incident and the death of a loved one. It is critical to get treatment if these feelings become overpowering or do not become more tolerable with time.
  1. Build relationships with others – Share your emotions with your loved ones. Search for an appropriate support group if loved ones are not able to comprehend your feelings. Survivors may interact with others, vent emotions, and offer advice in both face-to-face support groups and online forums.
  1. Make use of mindfulness exercises – People who have experienced tragedy may benefit from mindfulness, particularly amid flashbacks or moments of strong and unpleasant emotions. Focusing on the breathing, touching close fabrics, and hearing sounds both within and outside the space are some grounding strategies to try.
  1. Practicing self-care – It is terrifying and upsetting to see a loss or potential loss of life. Survivors can benefit from engaging in pleasurable activities. It is also critical for a person to get adequate sleep, maintain a well-balanced diet, and start exercising on a regular basis.
  1. Do something good towards others – Survivors of traumatic incidents might feel much better if they help others in some manner.

According to studies, some individuals experiencing survivor’s guilt and other symptoms  get better without therapy during the first year of the occurrence. Yet, at least one-third of individuals will experience the symptoms for three years or more. If an individual feels they would be unable to manage on their own, or if the symptoms are getting worse or becoming persistent, then it is critical to seek help.

Breaking The Cycle Of Generational Trauma

We do not simply just inherit our parents’ skin complexion, eye colour, or height. We can also acquire our parents’ stories, narratives, and perspectives on life. There is a piece of them that lives on in us, whether we are conscious of it or not. While carrying on our family’s tradition is a good thing to do, there may be unaddressed tension and trauma to sift through and tidy up.

WHAT IS GENERATIONAL TRAUMA?

Generational trauma is exactly what the name implies: trauma that is passed down from one generation to the next. It can be subtle, hidden, and ambiguous, emerging via nuances and unwittingly taught or suggested throughout someone’s life from infancy onward. 

Families with a record of unresolved trauma, depression, anxiety, and addiction can pass on ineffective coping techniques and suspicious views of life to subsequent generations. In this way, one might perpetuate the same behaviours and attitudes of previous generations, even if they’re healthy.

While generational trauma can impact anybody, individuals who have suffered major kinds of abuse, abandonment, torture, discrimination, and racial inequalities are at the greatest risk. Generational trauma has been studied in relation to Holocaust survivors, the Khmer Rouge atrocities in Cambodia, the Rwandan genocide, the relocation of American Indians, and the slavery of African Americans, among other things. While the evidence on how trauma manifests itself is varied, several studies have found increased rates of anxiety, sadness, and PTSD among trauma survivors and their offspring.

Trauma can cause poverty, poor parenting, decreased bonding, psychological distress, and insecure living conditions, all of which have a significant influence on children ’s development.

WAYS IN WHICH GENERATIONAL TRAUMA CAN AFFECT FAMILIES

  1. Emotions could become a point of conflict across generations – Regardless of how the trauma is coped with, elder generations within a family set the tone for how traumatic events must be (and frequently are) dealt with. Unfortunately, the trauma is passed down through generations since those who needed assistance never received it. In some situations, the traumatised family member may even pass on bad feelings to others in the family.
  1. Trauma can have an impact on the parent-child relationship – Individuals who have not gotten assistance and support for their trauma may establish unhealthy connections with their kid or grandchild. Emotional, psychological, or verbal abuse can all be signs of an unhealthy relationship. Abuse can be sexual or physical in severe situations.
  1. Unaddressed mental issues could cause relationship conflict – It is well known that older people do not believe in seeking the assistance of mental health specialists. Members of the family suffering from mental health issues (depression, anxiety, psychotic symptoms, etc.) genuinely require assistance because untreated psychiatric symptoms can lead to more trauma and emotional instability within one’s family.
  1. Younger generations may become “satisfied” with the way things are – If avoiding and denying ,and even embracing, the trauma becomes “normal” for the family, future generations will adopt this manner of “survival” and imitate the behaviours. People who avoid, downplay, or suppress family trauma exacerbate the situation for younger family members. We learn a lot about how to cope with stressful experiences.

HOW TO HEAL FROM GENERATIONAL TRAUMA

Many people do not realize their dysfunctional behavior because they are simply applying what they have learnt in the best way they know how to.  The key to change is awareness. There can be no change unless you acknowledge that something is wrong in your family unit.

  1. The first step is to recognise the patterns. Some are much more visible than others, such as domestic violence, abuse, anxiety, and gender norms. 
  1. The second stage is to become more conscious of what causes you to fall into these established patterns. Is it shouting, contempt, feeling undervalued, physical violence, or witnessing others bully? The list could go on and on. 
  1. The third stage is to become conscious of how you respond to triggers once you are aware of them. Do you shut down, get furious, get aggressive, or yell?
  1. The fourth stage is to understand how to create constraints in such behaviors. Creating a trigger word or phrase that will assist you detect when you are following a pattern. Creating a support network in order to be held accountable. 
  1. Giving yourself love and time to heal is the fifth stage. These are behaviors which have been ingrained in us for a long time. Generational trauma doesn’t really heal in a day or a week. It takes some time.

In order to enhance these processes, enlisting the assistance of a professional is a wonderful choice. Sometimes when the trauma you experienced is so deeply ingrained in you that you need additional assistance. 

Good Food, Good Mood

What we eat doesn’t simply influence our physical health: it could also influence our mental health and wellbeing.

The relation between food and mood originates from the direct connection between your brain and your gastrointestinal tract, which is sometimes referred to as the “second brain.” Billions of bacteria live in your GI tract, influencing the creation of neurotransmitters, which are chemical compounds that continually transport messages from the stomach to the brain. (Two common examples are dopamine and serotonin.)

Eating nutritious foods encourages the growth of “good” bacteria, which has a favourable effect on neurotransmitter synthesis. A consistent diet of junk food, on the other hand, might promote inflammation, which can stifle output. When your brain’s neurotransmitter production is in excellent health, it gets these positive messages loud and clear, and your emotions reflect it.

A Mediterranean-style diet (rich in vegetables, seafood, fresh herbs, garlic, olive oil, cereal, and grains) combined with fish oil helps alleviate depressive symptoms. On the other hand, there are two types of foods that are harmful to the brain: those that trick the brain into releasing chemicals that we may be missing, temporarily influencing our mood (for example, caffeine and chocolate), and those that discourage the conversion of other foods into nutrients which the brain requires (for example, saturated fat such as butter, lard and palm oil).

THREE WAYS YOUR DIET AFFECTS YOUR MENTAL HEALTH

  1. It is essential for brain development – When we eat healthy food, it transforms into protein-building blocks, enzymes, brain tissue, and neurotransmitters, which transport information and impulses across different regions of the brain and body.
  1. It shifts the brain into growth mode – Some nutrients and dietary habits are associated with alterations in a brain protein that aids in the formation of new synapses between brain cells. A diet high in omega-3 fatty acids and zinc raises levels of this chemical. A diet heavy in saturated fats and refined carbohydrates, on the other hand, has a significant detrimental influence on brain proteins.
  1. It fills up the gut with beneficial bacteria – The gut contains trillions of beneficial microorganisms. They keep harmful bacteria at bay and your immune system in check, which means they assist to control inflammation in the body. Some gut bacteria even aid in the production of brain-boosting B vitamins.

FOODS THAT PROMOTE GOOD HEALTH

  1. Whole foods – Preservatives, food colouring, and other chemicals have been linked to hyperactivity and depression in certain studies. So, if you only remember one thing, remember to consume real food, which is food which has been minimally processed and has a few nutritious components. Consider eating fresh fruits and veggies.
  1. Fiber – Plant-based meals are high in fibre, which helps your body digest glucose – or food sugars – more slowly, avoiding sugar highs and lows. Fruits and vegetables, as well as nutrient-dense carbohydrates like whole grains and legumes, are high in fibre.
  1. Antioxidants – These anti-inflammatory compounds are abundant in berries, leafy green vegetables, turmeric, and foods high in Omega-3 fatty acids, such as salmon and black chia seeds. Dark chocolate contains antioxidants as well.
  1. Vitamin D – Vitamin D aids in the synthesis of serotonin and is often obtained by exposure to sunshine. However, mushrooms, particularly reishi, cordycep, and maitake, are an excellent source. If you are vitamin D deficient, your doctor may also advise you to take a supplement.
  1. Magnesium – This important mineral aids in everything from nerve and muscle function to maintaining a regular pulse. However, it is also critical to the food-mood relation: A mineral shortage can harm your gut microbes and produce anxiety-like symptoms. Natural sources include dark chocolate, cacao nibs, almonds, and cashews, spinach and other dark leafy greens, bananas, and beans.
  1. Fermented foods – Fermented foods are high in probiotics, which are living microorganisms that are beneficial to the digestive tract. Sauerkraut, kimchi, miso, tempeh, and the fermented drink kombucha are a few examples. These items are also rich in sodium, so eat them in limit or avoid them entirely if you have hypertension.

Begin to pay attention to how different meals make you feel – not only in the moment, but also the day after. For two to three weeks, try eating a “healthy” diet, which includes avoiding all refined carbohydrates and sweets. Take note of how you feel. Then, one by one, gradually reintroduce items into your diet to observe how you feel. When some individuals “go clean,” they can’t believe how much healthier they feel, both mentally and physically, and how much worse they feel when they reintroduce items known to increase inflammation.