Crop circles have been appearing in grain fields all over the earth during the last few decades. They appear suddenly, usually at night. At first they were simple circles of bent-over grain stalks. Soon a new crop of more elaborate designs evolved—geometric forms reminiscent of profound mathematical theorems.

Some cerealogists (people who study crop circles) say that these diagrams must be created by intelligent alien beings from elsewhere. Even though these diagrams must be constructed in a very short timespan, the genuine crop circles never show any serious mistakes or blunders of execution. Cerealogists see this as evidence that the aliens must be very intelligent and much more advanced than we are. That’s mere speculation, of course. Others say the real reason is that there’s a worldwide conspiracy to hide the fact that the aliens sometimes do make mistakes. This coverup is carried out by people who want to preserve the myth that the aliens are a perfect race. The fact that you’ve never heard of such crop circle blunders just shows how effective this coverup is, they say. Mistakes are repaired at the site, or sometimes photographs of the circles are retouched. This has about as much to recommend it as any of the other conspiracy theories accepted and believed by simple-minded people.

Let’s look at more plausible explanations. Actually, a few designs do seem at first to have apparent irregularities or flaws. Some of these are surely caused by wind or rain, careless hoaxers or the trampling feet of crop circle buffs. But let’s set those aside and look only at those that are genuine and undisturbed. What appear at first to be iregularities or errors, may only be perfection of a higher and subtler kind, that we do not as yet understand.

Crop circles made by aliens?

Why should supposedly intelligent aliens travel huge cosmic distances across the galaxy just to doodle in our grain fields? What an absurd idea! [1] No one has ever seen them doing it, have they? Usually there aren’t even any ufo sightings associated with the circles, except for those reported after the fact by people with overactive imaginations. Surely intelligent aliens have better things to do. The true origin of crop circle designs may be nearer to home.

The whole thing begins to make sense once we realize that the earth is flat. We live on the backside of a huge flat blackboard (whiteboard, scratch paper, or whatever) used by aliens in their schools and universities. There are many of these in the universe. The flat disk of the earth is thin enough that student doodles made in alien art and math classes “bleed through” to our side. This happens because their writing instruments emit mitogenetic radiation (M-rays) that are well known to affect some living plants, especially wheat, barley, oats and corn. [2] M-rays weaken the stalk structure near the ground, and the stalks bend over gently to lie flat on the ground, showing no evidence of forceful breaking. So the crop circles in grain fields are nothing more than the reverse pattern of alien students’ diagrams made in geometry class.

Look carefully at photos of crop circles in books and on the internet, and a striking fact emerges. Crop circle designs are constructed from circular arcs and straight lines. Even the more complex crop circles, including those made to look like Mandelbrot sets, or the head of Mickey Mouse ©, conform to this rule. All crop circles can be constructed using the standard methods of Euclidean geometry. This should tell us something. The aliens making these drawings must be using ungraduated rulers and compases. [3] Has anyone ever seen a crop circle based on the form of a pentagon?

It’s true that a few designs have straight lines and curves that seem at first to be more complex than circles. But we must remember that straight lines are simply circles of infinite radius. Any complex curves can be constructed approximately from circular arc segments of different radius.

Did they use a ruler?

There’s good evidence that aliens have been defacing the earth’s surface with geological grafitti for a very long time. The curious lines and drawings on the Nazca plain in Peru likely have the same cause. At that earlier time in history the aliens had only primitive writing instruments. They were still using “pens” made of inorganic material, that emit E-rays (Earth rays). These only affect non-living things. Sand on flat ground is easily moved around with very little energy. The sandy surface of the Nazca plain acted like a giant Etch-A-Sketch ®. No advanced mathematical figures are found at Nazca, only long straight lines, pictures and geometric doodles. Obviously the aliens weren’t as scientifically advanced then. Then why are the lines so perfect, and the straight lines so straight? The reason is quite simple: on their side of the blackboard the aliens used rulers.

School kid’s prank?

A number of commentators claim to have proven to their own satisfaction that the Ancient Egyptians didn’t have the resources or technology to build the pyramids. Could it be that the pyramids of Egypt were built by alien kids, who, in a playful mood, pushed their play blocks into their blackboard, all the way through, coming up point first on our side? Following this line of reasoning, perhaps Stonehenge and similar structures are the result of an alien children’s game in which stone pegs are pushed into a geometric array of holes